Rent a Girlfriend

She was the first girlfriend I ever had, and she dumped me after just one month?

Welcome you sad lonely souls to the world of Rent-A-Girlfriend! For all you lonely virgin out there, who have never come in contact, yet alone talk to a beautiful woman, I hope this anime will help guide you your much needed salvation. These girls are the creme of the crop, the apex of beautiful women that will make every head turn no matter where they go. If your ready to take your first step to redeem your pathetic virgin life, let’s get into it! Team Single Pringles, let’s gooooo!

The story starts off with a 1st year college student Kazuya Kiyoshita. He tells us that his love life is going great. His first hottie girlfriend is Mami-chan and about 30 seconds later, we can see that she’s breaking up with him, and he’s back to being a lonely virgin again lol. Kazuya falls into a great depression as the love of his life broke up with him. After throwing a few too many tissues into the bin and scrolling through adult sites as an undercover minor on private mode, Kazuya decides to download the rent-a-girlfriend, Diamond app to get his life back on track.

Kazuya arrives at the designated spot to wait for his rental girlfriend. Still feeling down in the dumps, he wasn’t expecting too much from this date. Our rental girlfriend, Waifu of the year Chizuru walks in and then bam, Kazuya’s whole world was literally turned upside down! She was a perfect 10/10, Class A hottie of every man’s dream. However, no matter how hard Chizuru tried to make him happy during the date, Kazuya was so depressed that he viewed all her actions as insincere. Because of this after he got home, he left her a 1 star rating on the Diamond app lol

The real fun begins on their second date where Chizuru reveals her true colours and calls him out for being a depressed lil B***H lol. They couldn’t finished their little aquarium date because Kazuya received a phone call from his parents saying that his grandma has been hospitalised…..again. Somehow one thing lead to another and Chizuru got dragged along to the hospital as well. AND THAT KIDS IS HOW THE BIGGEST LIE IN HISTORY WAS BORN. Kazuya being under pressure decides to introduce Chizuru to his family as his girlfriend!!! Now what’s worse is that his family fully denied that their hopeless son and grandson was able to land this total hottie lol.

Oh, you say they can break up afterwards? What’s the big deal right? WELL, this is the anime world we’re talking about and of course we have to make it complicated right? It turns out Chizuru’s grandma is an inpatient at the very same hospital and that both of the grandmas were close friends with each other! Kazuya and Chizuru were trying to hide from their grandmothers, but Kazuya was having a hard time trying to hide his you know what……. lol. Who could blame the 18 year old boy at the peak of his youth, filled with testosterone ready to engage in baby making. Not today because, Chizuru quickly shuts him down a a swift kick to the nuts lol

It is agreed by both parties that Kazuya is to rent Chizuru for 1 hour every Wednesday to keep this girlfriend boyfriend charade going. But however, it wasn’t easy because they actually had to convince their friends as well lol. One day, Kazuya was on a date with Chizuru and boom, they ran into their friends who happened to be going to a nearby pub. They walked in, opened the door and helloooooo ex girlfriend lololol. Ex-girlfriend Mami was sitting there staring in confusion at how her dumbass ex-boyfriend managed to land this total hottie lol.

And we all know how manipulative Mami is and that she wants nothing but the worse for our Kazuya. She does everything in her power to sabotage Kayuza’s and Chizuru’s relationship because she just couldn’t stand the fact how her ex-boyfrind has already moved on from her. Just let our virgin boy have a bit of happiness please lol. From a viewers perspective, nobody likes Mami due to her cold hearted nature. But from my point of view, she be pretty hot like that ūüėČ lol

To make things more interesting, let’s throw Ruka Sarashina into the mix who is also in love with Kazuya!!!! She was also a rental girlfriend, who is a 10/10 on the hotness scale. If you put her next to the sun, the sun would pretty much burn up lol. Ruka has quite a stubborn personality and is definitely the clingy type who messages her now boyfriend Kazuya over 300 millions times per day lol. I find this quite cute as she actually loves Kazuya with all her heart and is willing to do anything for him. Yes, she even lets him continue with the rental girlfriend business lol. What a dream girl I say.

Oh, you thought there couldn’t be any more girls? Boom, you’ve got Sumi Sakurasawa who is a redhead loli who’s a 10/10 herself. With beauty to match with the other girls in the series and her dandere personality, she’s a force to be reckoned with for the shipping department lol. With the over abundance of choices, I wonder how Kazuya even sleeps at night lol. She doesn’t really have much to say on dates but I think she’s just starting to come out of her shell and it’s a good development to see. She has to potential to become waifu #3 of the Kazuya harem lol

There you have it, with the overabundance of fan service, original story line and great character development, you would be silly not to watch this amazing anime. Waiting for season 2 is killing me because what happens in the manga is no doubt one of the most exciting things I’ve ever read in my entire 26 year old life. Give it a try, I’m sure you’ll love it just as much as I do. Time to buy a body pillow now I guess lol.

Don’t forget to watch our national waifu’s in season 2!

Summer Wars

There’s no lack of painful things in this world, but hunger and loneliness must surely be two of the worst.

What do you do when the HOTTEST¬†GIRL¬†in school asks you out to her family gathering outside of town? Hell yeah, I would say yes. Who wouldn’t? Well, that’s kinda what happened to Kenji Koiso. A Kuonji HIgh School mathematical genius and part-time moderator for the virtual reality world of OZ. This kid was pretty much your typical socially awkward nerd who pretty much needs to get some.

One day, Kenji and his friend Takashi were messing around on their part-time job when booooom, Natsuki comes barging in and asks out of them to be her boyfriend. Natsuki informs them that she requires an escort for her great-grandmothers 90ths birthday for about 1 week. Sure why not. Little did Kenji know, that once they arrived at the Sakae’s estate in Ueda, Natsuki introduced Kenji as her fianc√©. And little did he know again, the Jinnochis’ are the living descendants of the Takeda clan who challenged the Tokugawa clan in the 1600’s. Talk about a powerhouse lol.

The huge family enjoyed each other’s companies and have a great time. Kenji was fitting in just dandy and everyone thought he was the man. However because the anime world needs a little drama, the producers decide to stir up some shit. Kenji met Natsuki’s half-uncle Wabisuke Jinoichi, a coding expert who was greeted warmly (lol) for stealing the family fortune and running off to America 10 years ago. He is the creator of Love Machine, the Artificial Intelligence created for the military.

Oz is pretty much like Facebook but MUCH BIGGER. It is a virtual world that allows people to create personal avatars and engage in activities such as sports, shopping, communication you name it. OZ HAS EVERYTHING. Because it’s super easy and convenient to use the application, people become overly dependant on the system. Boasting about their super high security and how impenetrable their mega encryption was, this was sure to get hacked lol.

One night Kenji discovers King Kazma was actually a 13-year-old name Kazuma who was Natsuki’s cousin. King Kazma¬†as you can probably tell is the king of e-sports. King Kazma¬†is a tall bunny wearing jeans with long ears. That’s¬†was probably the best description you’ll ever find on the internet by yours truly. That is why I will provide pictures lol. His agile¬†fighting style and power put him in another league than the rest of the competitors.

One night, Kenji was checking his phone and received a peculiar text message from OZ. Rather than ignoring the message filled with numbers, he decides to stay up all night to crack the code. Not only that he sent the answer back lol. ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE THE NEXT DAY. It turns out that the code was actually a password that can be used to override all the systems of Oz. And since Oz is like the lifeline for every service possible in this anime, you can guess how chaotic things got. Hospital, public transport, electricity systems all went haywire. And guess who was responsible……that’s right, Kenji’s face appeared on the news as a wanted man.

It turns out the A.I Love Machine has stolen Kenji’s avatar on Oz to hack the infrastructure that was causing the whole mess. This causes modern world issues such as traffic congestion, waterway failure and even the malfunctions of electronics. The little relatives Shota and Rika Jinnouchi discovered about Kenji’s involvement in the whole incident and got their police cousin Shota to arrest him. BUUUUT because of the huge traffic they had to turn back lol.

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This may possibly, nah¬†fuck that, this was the most moving scene I have ever seen in the history of anime. The 90-year-old grandma Sakae had enough of the situation and decided to lend a helping hand. She got out her contact book filled with phone numbers and started ringing important people. She didn’t say much but the words and encouragement she gave enabled the people to work their hardest and minimise the damage. This scene deserves a grammy I swear to god. It was that good!

But, we can’t have the plot go smoothly, can we. You guessed it, the grandma dies the next morning. The doctor uncle, Mansuke explains that Love Machine deactivated her heart monitor app that notifies the hospital about abnormalities. Low blow Love Machine. Now it’s time for payback. The¬†Jinnouchi family team up to take the AI down. A truly beautiful scene, everyone played a role in helping out. One cousin brought a supercomputer, one relative a huge crane and some ice to act as a coolant, one uncle brought some squid. And more squid. And more……. Yes, he brought 3 boxes of Squids lol. But the cooperation they had with each other truly made me want to be a part of their family for a few seconds.

The hunt for Love Machine begins. We’ve got Kazuma leading the main fight. Things were getting heated up and at first, it seems like King Kazma would win. Shit turns to custard and boom, the AI evolves and learns the attack patterns making it incredibly tricky to defeat. Idiot Shota saw the massive ice blocks around the supercomputer and decided to move it to grannys room to keep her body from decomposing. I mean he had good intentions but seriously wrong timing.

King Kazma froze due to the supercomputer overheating and Love Machine just keeps devouring other avatars Kirby lol. Now Love machine got so pissed off, he took over the Arawashi Asteroid Probe and make its crash trajectory towards a nuclear power plant in Japan. Everyone was left in despair until Natsuki found Granny’s will asking everyone to forgive Wabisuke for his actions.¬† Ultimately they were able to get him back and it was revealed that Love Machine loves games.

You’ve probably never heard of this but the game Natsuki used to confront Love Machine was Koi-Koi. They wagered the remaining accounts in desperation to sway Love Machine into the game like 50% discount display signs outside McDonald’s. With the help of Oz users worldwide, Natsuki was able to finally defeat Love Machine. KOI-KOI BITCH! Being a sore loser, Love Machine redirects the space probe towards the Sakae’s estate!

This was the most heated scene in the whole entire movie that will have you biting your nails. Kenji had to attempt and break into the space probes GPS through a series of complex mathematical codes. He only had like 3 minutes to solve 10 pages of code failing multiple attempts to do so. You can literally feel the pressure in your own seat as you see Kenji throwing away the pen in an attempt to crack it in his head and his nose bleed. He succeeded and redirects the space probe away from the household saving everyone!

The Jinnouchi was delighted over the victory praising Kenji as a hero.¬† Being pressured by 20 pairs of eyes, the family suggested that Natsuki and Kenji get married for real to repent for the lie about the engagement. The moment of truth comes and Natsuki and Keni were forced to kiss in front of the whole family. Did he do ittttttt. Nope, he got a nosebleed. On the bright side, he got a peck on the cheek so we’ll take what we can get lol. The support and warmth in this family movie were phenomenal. We can all be pests to one another but at the end of the day, we’re all family. Learn to forgive and forget because life’s too short to hold a grudge.

Natsuki Waifu, cute, sexy and fierce ūüėČ ‚̧

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